Parental Conflict: Information for Professionals

What is Parental Conflict?

Some level of arguing and conflict between parents is often a normal part of everyday life. However, there is strong evidence to show how inter-parental conflict that is frequent, intense and poorly resolved can have a significant negative impact on children's mental health and long-term life chances.

Damaging conflict between parents can be expressed in many ways such as:

• unresolved arguing
• silence
• lack of respect
• lack of resolution

Conflict can affect children in all types of parental relationships, including:

• parents who are in a relationship, whether married or not
• parents who have separated or divorced
• biological and step parents
• other family members playing a parenting role
• foster and adoptive parents
• same-sex couples

The Reducing Parental Conflict programme focuses on the ways that a couple behave, rather than the status of the relationship.

You can view this YouTube video about reducing parental conflict: why it matters to children and why it matters to services.
 

Why is it important for Practitioners to be aware of Reducing Parental Conflict? 

When parents are in conflict, research suggests that this reduces the effectiveness of other interventions for the family. Addressing parental conflict and the quality of interparental relationships is a critical component of improving child outcomes. In West Berkshire we are working across services on reducing family conflict and supporting families earlier so conflict does not lead to lasting damage for children, young people and parents. Offering support to address other issues in families is likely to be ineffective where the conflict between parents is not acknowledged and addressed.

Parental conflict and domestic abuse

When addressing parental conflict in a relationship, practitioners should continue to be vigilant and confident there are no indicators of domestic abuse, including fear, imbalance of power and controlling behaviour. If there are signs of controlling behaviour that adversely affects one person in a relationship, this can be an indicator of an abusive relationship.

The Reducing Parental Conflict programme seeks to address conflict not domestic abuse. In cases where domestic abuse is a concern, at any stage, local policies and procedures must be followed to manage any potential risk of harm.

Find out more about the difference between parental conflict and domestic abuse.

If you would like more information about domestic abuse, discuss with your line manager, local domestic abuse services or designated safeguarding lead. You can also read about and find resources for assessing harmful conflict.
 

Impact of parental conflict on children - the voice of the child 

You can view this YouTube video for Relationships Really Matter: Parental Conflict.

There are many forms of conflict in relationships, some are healthy. As adults, we are role models for our children so if we are able to remain calm and respectful whilst addressing any disagreements we have, it provides our children with important life skills for future interactions with others. Children who experience relationships which are positive and productive are more likely to feel more settled and have good social and emotional wellbeing. Unfortunately, conflict can sometimes be quite damaging; when children witness adults who shout loudly, argue a lot or perhaps ignore one another frequently or for long periods of time, it can have a negative impact on children's self-esteem, mental and physical health, behaviour and academic achievements and future relationships with others.

Research suggests if there is long term conflict between parents, it can affect multiple outcomes for children, including emotional, behavioural, social and academic development.

You can view this YouTube video for the impact of parental conflict on children.